Suffer the Children

During our group meetings on Sundays, we each tell a low and a high moment we’ve had during the week. One of the other interns was describing her low moment as when she saw a girl in the hospital and how she felt so sad. I thought it was weird how I had seen that exact same girl and only seen the smile on her face when I changed her, held her, and played with her.

Over the years that this program has been happening, a lot of interns have struggled with going to the hospital and the sadness and other emotions they feel there. We were warned about how hard it was going to be and what to expect. And yes, the first day I went was hard, but that was mostly because I was feeling sick and the heat in the hospital was making it worse.

When I go into a room and see a child there, I am saddened by their conditions, but it quickly disappears as I am able to hold them and make them smile and laugh. I guess that makes me different from some of the other interns. I feel the darkness, but we are here to bring light into the lives of these children, and I do not believe I can do that properly if I have darkness inside of me, so I let go of the darkness and enjoy the light that each of these children have inside of them.

“For the word of the Lord is truth, and whatsoever is truth is light, and whatsoever is light is Spirit, even the Spirit of Jesus Christ.

And the Spirit giveth light to every man that cometh into the world; and the Spirit enlighteneth every man through the world, that hearkeneth to the voice of the Spirit”

Doctrine and Covenants 84:45-46

Half of the children in my room at the orphanage are confined to wheelchairs of some sort for the majority of their waking lives. Some of them can move a bit on their own if they are put on the mattress in the middle of the room, but others have almost no control over their own bodies. It is sad to think that they are not held often, but spending time with them is my favorite part of being in the orphanage. The wheelchair kids do not have a bad bone in their small, imperfect bodies. All they want is a little attention and a chance to be held.

Let me introduce you to a few - Names changed for privacy

Lynn, all you have to do is blow gently in her face and she will give you the most blissful smile. And if you tickle her stomach or thighs, she was a wonderful laugh.

Jack, he cries or moans a lot, but he loves being held. He’s probably my favorite. He just snuggles up to me and he loves it when I bounce my legs or tip him back and up.

Anthony, he’s kind of hard to hold because he has muscle spasms, but I was able to have him on my lap for a while today. He is so fun to tickle and he absolutely loves it when I lay him back on my thighs and bounce my legs up and down.

Patricia, she has some of the better control of her body of the chair kids and she loves to be let out of her chair. Alex has been helping her to do sit-ups the last few days and she loves it. If she can’t be taken out of her chair for a time, she’s so happy just having someone rub her head and arms or tickle her neck.

Madison, she’s my girl who has been in the hospital for the last week. She was brought back to our room near the end of our time at the orphanage today. She has very little control over her body, but she is still able to smile when you give her your attention.

These children are some of my favorites here, but they have some very debilitating illnesses that will never go away. It is sad to think of what will happen to them when interns are no longer coming to the orphanage to give them extra attention, but all I can see when I’m with them are their wide smiles and beautiful, trusting eyes looking up at me.

“But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for such is the kingdom of heaven”

Matthew 19:14

They can’t do anything for me, but I already love them all so much. They are such beautiful children of God, and I cannot wait for when they are resurrected into perfected bodies and are able to run around for the first time.

“And he spake unto the multitude, and said unto them: Behold your little ones.

And as they looked to behold they cast their eyes toward heaven, and they saw the heavens open, and they saw angels descending out of heaven as it were in the midst of fire; and they came down and encircled those little ones about, and they were encircled about with fire; and the angels did minister unto them.”

3 Nephi 17: 23-24